For Your Enjoyment…

… some old stories of mine. 😉 I was sorting through some old things, de-cluttering, and found some stories that were too funny note to share. Enjoy!

Music Day – 12-11-01

What we do on Music Day
Usually, I practice 15 minutes on music day. Music day is Tuesday. On days other than music day, I practice 1 hour! My lesson is half an hour. So, it is like I practice 45 minutes. I play guitar. So does my dad. Our teacher is Mr. Ramo. He is very nice. I am on the 4th string. We stay for one hour. Time: 1200 – 1:00

After Music class
We usually go to the post office. Last week their was package! After the post office we go home and eat lunch. We sometimes have sandwiches. This week gramma is here!

After Lunch
We go to American girl club. We have a snack, do a craft, Mrs. Parker reads to us and we go home. For craft we are doing embroidery.

After American Girl
We come home eat dinner and Caitlyn goes to ballet. This week she does not have ballet because our teacher is going to see the Nutcracker. We are in it! I am a snowflake and Caitlyn is a French dancer.

A Zoombini tale
One upon a time, there was a beautiful land called Zoombini land. Now, the people in it were called Zoombinis. The girls all looked the same and the boys all looked the same. There was only one difference between them. They all had different voices. This particular story is about two Zoombinis who were in love. Their names were Cuie (cuE) and Madam Phonicia (Fo-Knee-ci-A). The problem was, Phonecia’s parents did not want her to marry Cuie, because he was only a peasant and they were nobles. If only there was a way to make Cuie rich! Thought Phonecia. Then one day, she found out that Cuie was a duke in disquise. Still, her family would not believe her. So, she eloped with Cuie. She wrote that they were doing well and that their king-dom was the city of Zoomville. After a year, they had their first boy, who they named Cuie JR. As soon as he was old enough (19 YR.) They sent him out disquised as a peasant. During those 19 years they had four girls and three boys. All the girls had beautiful voices. When they sang, it sounded like Angels were singing. The boys, they were smart. The girls, though, looked very different with their hair down. Then one day, Cuie died. Phonicia chose her oldest son Cuie JR. to help her rule. Cuie JR.’s wife, Emasa, was helping also. They had a son named Cluie (Clu-E).
When Phonicia died, Cluie Jr. and Emasa ruled the kingdom. They ruled it for many years. And lived happily ever after.
The End!

The Story of the Man and the Alligator
One day a man was whatching some people swim. Then a clown came by and saw the man and pushed him into the water. The man didn’t know that there was a dead alligator in the pool. When the man saw the alligator he freaked out. Then he started to swim and he saw that it was dead and was’t scared. The clown laught at this because when he pushed the man into the water he kicked the alligator into the water! Soon the clown got the hiccups because he had been laughing so much. The man was mad, he thought that the clown had not kicked the alligator into the water. Then the man pulled the clown into the water, in the water they had a fight until the pool closed. While they walking out, the man pulled off the clown’s pretend red nose and said “you look really funny in that.” Then the clown said I am sposed to look really funny. Then the clown said: will you please give me a ride? Because someone took me here. Yes I will replied the man, only if you pay me fifty cents. Yes I will, replied the clown. When the clown whent into the car he started to be silly. The man said if you be silly then I will not give you a ride. The clown said: will you take me to that tent over there. Why? Because today is a circus. Oh I didn’t know that, I will stay for the circus. I know my act will be silly. Of corse because you are a clown. I am in a act with six other clowns. (In the circus) as the seven clowns entered they were doing hand stands, cartwheels and summersalts. First four clowns got in a car and drove all around the ring. Then a small car with the other three clowns and the two small cars crashed and all the clowns fell out. Then there were two trapalenes and they jumped really high and gave each other a high five. The man really liked the circus, In fact, the next day he was swimming at the pool and the clown was too. As they approached each other that day the man said you had a really funny act yesterday. Thank you the clown replied. Why don’t we go dive? O.K. They had a fun time together that the clown asked the man over for dinner that evening. When the man came over that evening they sat and talked on the couch while dinner was baking. While they were eating they were duscusing the what the clown did at the pool with the alligator and the seven clown act. When they got to the seven clown act they both bust out in giggles. When they were done eating they went back to the couch and drank some coffe tea. At eight thirty, the man said I have to go home now, but will you come to my house tomorow? Yes, I will. Can we go swimming at 11:00? Yes, we can. I will see you tomorow. Good bye. (Next day at 11:00)
Do you want to dive first? Yes I do replied the clown. When they got to the diving board the clown went first when the clown first touched the water he started to be silly. The man just said thats what clowns do as he jumped off the diving board. Would you like to go to a park the clown asked? Yes I would replied the man. (Next day at the park) When they got to the park the clown asked are there any mattresses around here? Why yes there are, but why do you want one? I don’t know. Not long after that, they found a mattress under a tree and the clown picked it up and threw it into the tree. Then the man and the clown said together: that is what clowns do to earn money. As they were walking they spoted a cat and the cat was climbing a tree thent hey saw that anoughther cat that looked just the same as the other one. Then the clown had an idea! The clown got the smaller cat and climed the tree and got the bigger cat and climed back down. Just then some dogs surrounded the clown and started barking.
Shoo shoo shoo! Said the man.
The dogs went away and they went to thier homes (the man and clown) to change into their swimsuits. Before the man left his house he grabbed a fake snake. When the clown jumped in the man through threw the snake in the water.
The End!

A Dog’s year
Once upon a time, a litter of five puppies was born on December 20th. They were named, Rudolph, Prancer, Dasher, Comet, and Donner. Do you ask why? Because they were born around Christmas. The owners put up a sign that said: 4 pupies for sale, named: Dasher, Donner, Comet, and Prancer. They were keeping Rudolph.
On December 22 all of the one’s the owners were selling except Prancer were sold. So, they decided to keep Prancer also. By Christmas eve, the two dog’s had little sweaters and scarfs. Rudolph was a god singer. This is his favorite song: Jungle Bells.
On Christmas Rudolph received a fake, light-up nose! Prancer received a bone. They received a little sleigh and yoke. Later that day their owners took them for a walk. The dog’s used their sleigh and yoke.
Rudolph and Prancer liked to play in the snow. They wrestled, they buiried each other, and they danced. The owners were glad they had kept Prancer. If they hadn’t Rudolph would have been lonely. Soon they (the owners) decided to adopt a girl in the Spring.
On march 25th, they went to Russia to adopt a girl. They chose a girl named Olga. She had long black hair and light blue eyes. Olga was 12 years old. A good age to help with the household work.
When they came back with her, on May second, the dogs sung a song called welcome home. It goes like this: Welcome home, welcome home, welcome home, dear pretty girl, welcome home, pretty girl. Then the dogs sang it again this time replacing pretty girl with our owners.
In the summer, Olga turned thirteen. On her birthday the dogs sang happy birthday. Her chores were: washing and sweeping the floors, folding laundry, and feeding the dogs. She liked doing her chores and going to school. Most of all she liked playing with the dogs.
In the fall, Rudolph and Prancer loved to play in the leaves. On Thanksgiving, Olga tried cranberry sauce and turkey. She liked the cranberry sauce but not the turkey. Olga made Russian presents for her mom, dad, and the dogs.
In five years Olga was married. And everyone lived happily ever after.
The End!

A Cat’s Year
Once upon a time, a cat gave birth to a litter of five kittens. The kittens were:
Rusty, Meow-meow, Mouse, Tao, and Zoey. The owners decided to keep all the kittens. The owners had 4 kids. They were Caitlyn, Kyleigh, Nate, and Candace. Caitlyn was 10, Kyleigh was 8, Nate was 3, and Candace was 6 months old.
Zoey liked to roll in the grass in the spring. In the summer she liked to climb trees. Zoey liked to chase the leaves in the fall. Winter is her favorite season. She is taken care of by Caitlyn.
Meow-meow also liked to roll in the grass in the spring. In summer she liked to swim in the lake. Fall was her favorite season. In winter she liked skating on the lake. She was taken care of by Kyleigh.
Mouse’s favorite season was spring. In the summer she liked to chase MICE. In fall she also liked to chase leaves. In the winter she buried herself in the snow. She was taken care of by Nate.
Tao liked to play hide and seek in the spring. Summer was her favorite season. In fall, she liked to climb trees. In the winter, she also liked to Ice sckate on the lake. Tao was taken care of by Candace.
Rusty’s favorite season was winter. In the spring he liked to walk aroundt he house. In summer, he liked to sit on someone’s lap and purr. In fall he also liked to climb trees. He was taken care of by the mom and dad.
Zoey’s favorite holiday was Easter, because Jesus rose from the grave. Meow-meow’s favorite holiday was Thanskgiving, because the pilgrims came to America. Mouse’s faveorite holiday was Christmas, because Jesus was born. Tao’s favorite holiday was good Friday because Jesus died for our sins. (on that day) Rusty’s favorite holiday was valentines-day because he got to sit on peoples laps all day and purr.
One day 8 years later, Rusty and tao got married. 9 months later, Rusty and Tao and 4 kittens. They ewre named: Caitlyn, Kyleigh, Nate, and Candace. The owners kids were now 18, 16, 11, and 8. Caitlyn was engaged. Her wedding was that Friday. Her wedding went very well. And EVERYONE LIVED Happily ever after.
The End!

{this ‘book’ – A Dog’s, Cat’s, and Hamster’s year (and birds too) had a cover and illustrations. 😉 I hand-made copies and sold or gave them to almost everyone I knew)

Queen Elanor’s Wisdom
Once upon a time, there was a queen named Elanor. She was very wise. One day, an enemy army laid siege to the city. The city council asked her what to do. She replied: “See how long the food will last, then I will decide.”
Later that evening, the city counsil said it would only last another month. She said “Follow me, I will show you some thing.” Queen Elanor took them to her chamber, and opened a trapdoor that was under her bed. She said. “Get a lantern and follow me.” She led them down into a tunnel and went through it. After an hour, they came up. They were three miles a way from the castle in another city. They asked for an army to come help. The King of that city asked “Why?” Queen Elanor explained why. The King sent a troop of 2,000 soldiers. The enemy only had 1,000. All of the foot soldiers went through the tunnel and came out at the first trap door they saw. They came out one by one. The calvery was right behind them. Before long all the people were gathered in all four towers to watch the Battle. Before long, all the enemies except eleven had been killed. The 11 were captured. Meanwhile, in the other city; The King, whose name was Richard, asked Queen Elanor to marry him. And of course – she said yes.
And they lived Happily Ever After!
The End!

The Babel Babble Story
Once, in the country of Babylon, when King Bigbop was ruling, his people said (They babbled in the same language) “As long as we babble with the same language, let us build a box with steps so we may bound up to the big sky. We shall call it the ‘Box of Balance.’”
So they made a basic plan before they built the box. Meanwhile, the king had begun to believe that they were beginning to plan a rebbellon and burn his brickwork house. So, he packed up his belongings and was about to leave when he saw them building. He began to inquire what they were building. They said that they thought he was bad and they were building so they could begin to get away from him. Then King Bigbop asked God to confuse their babbaling so that they couldn’t build. God did that, and they spread all over the earth.
The end!

… and I also found a few ‘chapter books’ I’d scribbled down in notebooks.

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4 thoughts on “For Your Enjoyment…

  1. Laura says:

    Those were hilarious 😀
    “After Music class
    We usually go to the post office. Last week their was package!”
    I thought this was funny for some reason, like ya’ll hardly ever got packages or something 🙂

    The Zoombini tale was… interesting 🙂 They’re names were funny!

    I loved the one about the clown. I liked how the man threw a fake snake into the water, to pay the clown back 🙂

    I’m guessing that A Cat’s Year was based on cats that ya’ll really had?

    Probably ‘Queen Elanor’s Wisdom’ and ‘The Babel Babble Story’ were the best. The Babel story was a really good retelling 🙂

    Like

    • kyleian says:

      I forgot to say in the post that Zoombinis are creatures from a computer game we used to have, a logic game that we all loved. Not sure where I got the names. 😉
      A Cat’s Year… not really. We had a cat named Zoey, and later one named Vinnie.
      I think “The Babel Babble Story” was written for school because I read it to Cait and she remembers doing a similar project.

      Like

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